Lessons Learned from my 50’s

So…I have exactly 175 days until I turn 60. Roughly 6 months. Nothing magical happens at 60, I mean, I already qualify for a senior discount at most places. AARP sends me junk mail weekly. I’ve been reminded already to have yet another colonoscopy, mammogram and bone density test. So…I’m not sure what the big deal is other than it marks the turning of another decade.

I was hit with the thought, however, of where do I want to be in 6 months? What could I accomplish? What could I give up? Could I actually make a journey entry every day for 6 months? Could I actually get the book of poetry organized? Could I lose the weight that I gained while I was 59?

And of course, that lead to me to thinking of what I’d accomplished or maybe just learned during my 50’s. It seemed a solid place to start before I made a new list for the next 6 months.

So here we go…The top five things that I gave up during my 50’s.

1. Spanx: Spanx are not made for daily use. I wore them under my work attire all through my 40’s. Then one day, my abdomen blew up like I was pregnant with triplets, and I almost passed out in the bathroom…and did I mention that I was at work? Another nurse ordered me to rip the Spanx off, talked me out of laying on the bathroom floor (thankfully) and lead me to the school nursing lab. I ended up laying on the bed with a mannequin for an hour. It was only then that I realized that the Spanx were sitting on top of the student medication cart, in full view of every student that I’d ever given a bad grade to. I’m assuming they were tossed out since I never claimed them. I also stopped wearing them daily. I feel like it was a sign from God.
2. Make-up: I gave up wearing Make-up daily during COVID. Most people never knew that I wore it anyway since I always had a pretty light hand with the foundation. My skin is spotted, bumpy and has been a playground for the dermatologist with Liquid nitrogen. I have a white target on my nose from where the Basal cell cancer was scraped, burned and scraped again. It is what it is…foundation just settles in the crevices at this point. I’ll wear it to weddings…or press conferences.
3. Working for someone else: I don’t work 14 hours a day for a corporation anymore. The only thing that could get me to work 14 hours would be my grandchildren, and only if I got a nap afterward. When the school that I worked for closed suddenly, it was a huge lesson in realizing that I had very little control over anything when the decisions made were so far above me. So…Eric and I started a business and we just live on less. Less money, true, but more importantly…less stress…less frustration…less being beholden to someone that makes a whole lot more money than I do. I love less! 
4. Getting my internal validation from working all the time. Eric and I take a ton of three-day trips during the year. We took a four-day trip, partially by train, to Seattle in 2020 right before the world shut down. We went to Zion and Yosemite in 2022 and back to Yosemite in January. All were little trips to unwind and enjoy the journey. We spent three days in Independence off the 395 last month. We love the drive and it rejuvenates us. I got a $10,000 payout from the school that closed for unused vacation hours. This was after I paid close to 50% taxes on the amount. I’m getting older. I’m not hoarding vacation hours anymore under the guise of being super dedicated to my job. I work so we can pay the mortgage, see our grandkids and go places…any maybe shop at Target. Or Amazon.
5. Feeling like the house has to be perfect before I can entertain. We did some work on the house and yard over the past few years. New concrete, an updated but still tiny kitchen, and an actual plan for where things would grow in the yard.  We originally had a “fly, be free,” method of planting so we had a Bird-of-Paradise cohabiting with a plum tree that somehow gave birth to a cactus. None of it made any sense. We have a nice yard that has reserved space for our 24…25…could be 26 at this point Minions for December. It was my only contribution to the planning.  Leave the Yellow Bell trees and save room for the Minions. Eric planned the rest. Regardless, however, our house is still a dwelling that survived 3 boys. We use it frequently to just have people over for dinner or to just hang out.  It’s not perfectly decorated. The white tile is mostly clean at the beginning of the night and resembles the floor from Little House on the Prairie by the end. I’ve realized that no one cares. People just come over to relax and feel grateful that they weren’t the ones that had to mop.

So those were my top five things that I gave up during my 50’s. I did realize that I didn’t plan to give these things up…they just happened. Or some just happened to me, but worked out to my benefit in the end.

But I wonder…what could I accomplish if I had a plan? Hmmm….

So that’s it for now. The next goal will be to figure out what I need to do to plan for 60. I’ve got 6 months. I’m, as always, working on losing weight. Or at least, contemplating how I will work on losing weight. I know there is more, however.

Feel free to give some suggestions. Unless you’re going to tell me something like to start running.

I don’t need that kind of negativity in my life.

Posted in Empty Nest Grandparenting Marriage and Tagged Leaving 50 Lessons Learned Turning 60